I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Randomize
