Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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