ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Randomize
