I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Is it penis luge time yet?
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
