There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
