I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Less talking, more tequila
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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