his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Even my vagina gasped.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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