Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize