its not stalking. its research.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
