wat bout pragnant strippers??
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
