guys are only as good as the porn they watch
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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