how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Randomize
