Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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