Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
