I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
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