If i come over, it means nothing
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize