dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
