He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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