I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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