please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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