this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
This is the high leading the old right now
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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