It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
you traded sex for a burrito?
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
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