OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize