thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
My life is pants optional.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
