She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
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She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
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I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize