just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
