are you so shy because you have an std?
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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