The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
