too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Randomize
