Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
