ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Randomize