Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
