So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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