It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
