how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
