So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I see more hoeing in ur future
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