Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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