"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
