proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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