I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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