No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
