I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Randomize
