What did we do last night that was yellow?
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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