Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Randomize
