So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize