She's JV to your varsity
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize