the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
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