in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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