it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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