You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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