its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
